What's love?

HOW do you know when you love someone or not? What does it feel like when you have never been in love before? I'm 54 but it's just never happened for me.

Answer this week by Dr Charmaine Saunders, a counsellor with 20 years’ experience in the field of personal development.

If you have never been in love before, let me say you will know the feeling when it hits you! It is the most magical, breathtaking experience, like a rollercoaster ride and a walk in a deep forest and a swim in the bluest ocean all at once – it is exhilarating and scary and totally crazy. It may not last and may not even be real but every person alive has the right to experience this at least once.

Loving on the other hand is a lot more complex and yet it is as simple as breathing. It takes a lot more time to get to know a person and find out if what you feel for them is really the true kind of love or just romantic illusion.

Trust yourself and trust your heart. You may be wrong a few times, risk all and get hurt but that is all part of it. In the end, you will grow, learn and hopefully, find the right one. It's never too late but you have to get out there and give it a chance.

Charmaine is a therapist, columnist, motivational speaker, lecturer, media commentator and author of six self-help books including her latest, `Winning Relationships'. She specialises in the areas of personal development, relationships, wellness, sexuality and positive life and she writes Q&A advice columns, blogs, books and feature articles that deal with the above topics. Charmaine also regularly appears on TV and radio. Find out more at www.charmainesaunders.com