Thank heaven it’s over

IS IT difficult to sue someone under the Trade Descriptions Act? I only mention it because it is a definite consideration after going to see the latest romcom-weepy from Kate Hudson. Entitled A Little Bit of Heaven, the title of this film is as misleading as the film itself is clichéd.

Kate Hudson plays Marley, who we meet as a confident, feisty, single woman in her 30s, with a successful career working for an advertising agency in New Orleans. The film leads us through her successful pitch to win an account with a condom manufacturer, before hinting she may actually be secretly dissatisfied with her glamorous, single lifestyle.

Moving on to her weight loss and tiredness, it is soon established she has an advanced stage of colon cancer, which she persists in calling “ass cancer”. Of course, normally this would lead to an onslaught of emotions we must presume are there somewhere in the shallows of this movie, which claims to offer a delicate mix of comedy and emotion that come together to tell the story of one woman’s ultimate self-discovery.

In fact, this is pure cotton candy for the brain, with a side helping of sickly sentimentality, which fails to trigger any hint of empathy. The emotional impact fails entirely to shine through and there are no real moments of poignancy, which let’s face it, one would expect in a film about a young woman dying from colon cancer.

The only time Hudson’s portrayal of a terminal cancer patient feels in any way real is when she describes the fear she has of her mother never getting over her death and worrying who will look after her dog. The rest of the time she looks as if she is merely too hung over to put her make-up on.

I’m sure many people faced with a terminal illness would use humour for deflection and as a coping mechanism, or simply to put on a brave face. But the continual toilet-humour quips as an overplayed defence mechanism are just so trite, that frankly it becomes wearying. Yes, she has issues. We get it.

Then there is the completely inappropriate doctor-patient relationship. Admittedly Gael Garcia Bernal is charming as the doctor who cannot tell jokes and adores his yo-yo collection but his character gives only one moment of real insight when he declares, “I have never met anyone who talks so much but says so little”.

Then again that charm is lost, largely due to the fact there is absolutely no chemistry, spark, or connection whatsoever between the two romantic leads. They just don’t match. And no, despite what the movie executives say, I don’t consider Marley has met her match and finds the threat of falling in love scarier than death.

Add this to the scenes depicting a fluffy cloud version of heaven, where God, played by Whoopi Goldberg (of course), grants her three wishes and somewhat ironically, suddenly I feel like I am in movie hell.

Amid all this negativity, happily there were genuinely funny moments at the hands of Peter Dinklage, of Game of Thrones fame, a few worthy moments courtesy of the supporting cast and some great music.

Kate Hudson is perfectly placed and entirely believable as the vibrant, successful career woman who just wants to have fun and even credible as the petulant daughter who distances herself from her parents. But as a dying woman who is coming to terms with life, death – and love – she’s just not convincing. This film is indeed tragic but sadly for all the wrong reasons.

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